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Jonathan Feathers, Handyman Extraordinaire

♪♪ [audience cheering] Honey, do you know where
my toolbox is? I'm gonna try to fix the leak
in the faucet. I actually just called a guy,
he's gonna do that and he's gonna fix the leg
on the table, too. Oh, all right. Yeah. [doorbell rings] Oh, that's him,
could you get it? Yeah. Well, hello there. Jonathan Feathers,
handyman at your service. I'm here to clean the gutters,
snake the drains, mow the lawns,
and ease the pains. Come on in. This a mighty fine house
you got here. Oh, thank you. Reminds me of my childhood home,
except much bigger, and not inside of a tree. You grew up
in a treehouse? Well, it was a home inside
of a tree.

What did you say your name
was again? Jonathan Feathers. That's a
really interesting name. Well, I used to be a bird. This man is crazy,
where did you find him? He had really good reviews
on Yelp. Fast, thorough,
works for birdseed. I thought it just meant
he was really affordable. Well, it is affordable,
ma'am, I can assure you. You see? The going rate for birdseed
is about 53 cents a pound. Although, I do also take
Apple Pay, but it's usually just the core. I have so many questions. Like, you used to be a bird? Well, you see? One day, I happened to let
out a dropping, which happened to
land on a woman, who happened
to be a witch. She cursed me by turning me
into a human, and took my family prisoner. At first, I wanted to cry, but I had not become accustomed
to my human form, so I just kind of went. [scratchy throat sound] And now I must complete
300 good deeds to be restored
to my natural form. How's that working out
for ya? Well, I'm about halfway there, which made being a handyman
a natural fit.

You see? I don't know if you know this, but us birds use tools all
the time. Do you also
make the tools? I wouldn't be a real bird
if I didn't. Now, is this the table
right here? Yeah, it's just
that right one. Oh. Oh, it's just a little loose,
I can tighten that in no time. There we go. Task 149, done. What will you do
when you hit 300? Well, I suppose it's been ages since I've regurgitated food
into the mouth of a youngling, so I suppose I'll go back
to raising my family.

Alanis Morissette

You can't do
that as a human? Well, ma'am,
it's frowned upon to vomit into the mouth
of a human child. No, I meant, have a family,
just embrace being human? Well, that's awful kind of you, but you see,
that's just not who I am. I am a bird, and you've just got to let me
spread my wings and fly. Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have a leaky faucet to fix. It's upstairs, second door
on the right. Thank you. Jonathan: Well,
hello there, birdy. [squawking] Oh, I'm sorry, ma'am. Let me take care of that
for you.

[in audience] Ugh, ew! Matt: We have a roomba. This is just fine, sir. Oh, he's getting
all of them, huh? I don't know why I wanted
powdered donuts today. Hm. Task 150, done. [explosion] [cackling] Well done,
Jonathan Feathers, you have accomplished one half
of your good deeds. And as such, I shall give you
half your reward. [chimes]
[cackling] Well, would you look at that? I'm gon' fix that sink! [whistles] I don't believe this. That's the same witch that
turned your brother into a cat. THAT'S where I knew her from! [audience cheering] Hey everyone, thanks
for watching this video. Don't forget to like it
and subscribe to our channel, and leave a comment below about which animal you are
trying to become through your good deeds. An otter, 'cause they hold
hands when they sleep and it's really cute.

Alanis Morissette wrote
that song, "You Otter Know." You know so much. I feel so foolish..

As found on YouTube

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